A few of my favorite things

Women of my dreams

I've been single since June 25, 2005.

I've exposed myself to a lot of different groups of people and geographical locations since, hoping to meet someone that strikes my fancy.

And although I have met plenty of dudes and went on plenty of dates, it seems that I connected the best with... well... a few girls.

These girls provided me certain aspects/qualities I look for in a hetero-relationship.

Well, minus the dick of course.

Here is a list why I should be a lesbian, but am not because I love the cock.


1. Jamie: My fiance. I proposed to her on facebook and she accepted me. Jamie and I are retardedly similar, it's scary. We are both vulgar, blunt, honest, comfortable in our own skin, confident, sexy, smart, hilarious and shameless.

We worked together on our college yearbook. I first fell in love with her for her dedication and passion to it, something most people didn't give a flying fuck about. She also had the most out-there sense of humor... something I find to be rare but much appreciated.

She has a way of reading me too... as if she knows exactly what is going on in my head... even if it's inappropriate. And she doesn't' judge me for anything. If anything, she enjoys my flaws as a decent human being, makes fun of me, and accepts me for who I am.



2. Vivie: It's probably my little obsession with people who look like Vietnamese orphan children, but I absolutely adore this woman. I met her as an RA and we were clearly opposites from the start. But that didn't stop her from trying to get to know me. I think the fact that we are so different attracted us to one another. We spend a lot of time together, swimming in each others minds.

After several months, we discovered we share more similarities than we thought.

Vivie has a very unique set of eyes. She sees the world in a light I think everyone should have. If half of the people Vivie's age saw the world the way she does, this world would be ten times better off.

She is intelligent, observant, hilarious, real, caring, kind, comfortable in her shoes, confident, aware, and adorable. Heart of gold this woman has. As well as mine.

If neither of us finds a man, we've decided that I would have her child and she would have mine. How? Find a sperm donor within our families. Hence our status on facebook: It's complicated.

Vietnamese-Polish babies? Sexiness.



3. The Katies: Although Katie Uno and Katie Due are married, I happen to be their love affair on the side... which I'm okay with.

The Katies and I will always share a deep, passionate love... and we will always put each other first before any guy. Currently, both girls have significant others. Thier men know exactly where they stand. Behind the tri-pod.

Our connection started out through living in Rome, and anything Italian will forever hold us together like glue. If life decides to take a shit on us, we're all selling our possessions and buying a house in Tuscany... Under the Tuscan Sun style.



4. Shannon: Girlfriend. Although I've known this lady since I was 11, my love for her didn't truly spark til summer 2008. She is one of the strongest people I know. Not only physically, but emotionally, romantically, sexually, and even economically! (so responsible).

I adore her for her commitment to anything she puts her head to, her love of close friends, and her "I don't give a fuck" attitude. She is who she is, and if you don't like it, sucks for you.

Shannon and I are a part of a quad of girls called the girlies. The other two happen to have significant others. Naturally Shannon and I hang out a lot since the other two have their men... and thus we became a couple so we don't feel left out on the couple events. :)

If neither of us finds a man, we've planned to build a huge house in an urban location where we would each have our own "wing" of the house for our FUN FRIENDS. We will also be have ostriches, llamas, turtles and a monkey.



5. Grace: My most recent girlfriend. We are also very much a like, despite our different pasts. Grace amazes me with her confidence. Although most people take it as arrogance or call her egotistic, I think she's one spicy cinnamon jelly bean... and there's nothing but sexiness in that.

We bond over our talents in the communications/journalism field... but we also have the same outlook on a lot of things in life...which is rare for me to find since I am... well a bit odd.

Plus, she's a redhead... and I'm obsessed with redheads. Redheads are either really ugly or absolutely gorgeous. There is no middle ground. Grace, naturally, lands in the latter sect.

If neither of us finds a man, we've decided to move to Arizona. Rent is cheap and the boys are hot!

What ALL these women have in common (besides the obvious intelligence, wit, gorgeousness, etc), is that Jamie, Vivie, the Katies, Shannon, and Grace all know their worth. These women don't settle. They don't compare themselves to anyone or anyone else's standards. They work hard, and they know how to play hard (in different ways... but it's still playing!) And if anything, that is what I respect and love the most about these women.

More women need to find their self worth.

These women also have the ability to carry conversation... something that unfortunately lacks for some reason if you have a penis. Don't get me wrong, I'm sure there are plenty of men out there that can... but... where they at?

I'm not trying to whine about boys. I enjoy being single. I am in no rush to get married or start a family. There are still so many things on my To Do List before I flip to that chapter.

And just for the record, I am not bisexual. I would never consider dating a woman.

I do believe in Hetero-life mates though.

:)

Generation Overwhelmed

I love reading literary debates where people argue a point without even seeing one another's faces.

Here's one that a friend posted of her facebook.

It sheds some good light on us twenty-somethings.

Read it here.

And one thing to keep in mind is that we shouldn't use this as an excuse for our generation... but as a diagnosis. (Credit = Jay Lubow.)

What is our solution?

Wandering mind wondering

I have been up since 2 am.

Went to bed at 9 pm last night... or rather... I passed out at that time.

Gotta love holidays. Pretty much drank ALL day with the family.

And I didn't wake up with a hangover! Finally. For whatever reason, I've been waking up with hangovers recently...which is weird since I typically don't get them.

In any case... I'm having second thoughts about my future... and what I want to do with it.

I don't think I have the patience, the drive, or the commitment right now for school.

All I really want to do is travel. Or live in the mountains.

I renewed my season pass to Mammoth for next year, so that means I'll be in California for another year.

Afterward, I think I just might pick up and move to Poland, ya know, to postpone growing up some more. :)

George Carlin was right

George Carlin - Do You Have Freedom Of Choice? - video powered by Metacafe

Where the flying cars?

It's really upsetting to look at the world today, in the year 2009, and see how money driven it really is.

Remember as a child, we heard stories of the future and how it would include robots and flying cars and shit?

Well, fuck the flying cars...

Where are the electric cars?

Where are the eco-friendly machines, not using gas and polluting the air we breathe?

The first electric car was made in the 1830s. The fucking eighteen-thirties!

My mom and were talking about how ridiculous the vast majority of cars out there are still using gas. At this point, wouldn't you think at least, AT LEAST, 50% of cars should be electric ones?

She also mentioned something I wasn't aware of. She spoke of some sort of movie that documented what apparently happened in the early 1990s. I am paraphrasing here, so I might get some of this wrong, but she mentioned a lot of electric cars were made and released, but because they would essentially ruin the gas companies, someone worked out a deal where all electric cars were to be bought back from satisfied consumers (and apparently people who bought these cars absolutely loved them) and destroyed.

What. the. fuck.

Thanks to Google and a bit of research (aka typing in 'electric cars'), there is a documentary out there called "Who killed the electric car?" I don't know if it's the same one my mom was talking about, but whatever.

Hmmm. Guess what I'll be doing tomorrow?

In the meantime, I'm going to bed. I can't seem to get myself to fall asleep until 2 am, and not only is it unhealthy... I'm getting annoyed by it.

I need help.

Don't ever drink alone

As I sit here, drinking Johnny Walker with some Coke Zero (no calories!), I can't seem to focus on any one thing.

I am one of those multi-colored bouncy balls on steroids, bouncing off of everything, even the soft things like couches and stuffed animals.

My body is physically exhausted right now. And my mind should be as well, but it's not. I just worked from 7 a.m. to 11 p.m. for two days straight. Mind you, I don't ever really fall asleep before 2 a.m. for whatever reason... and still... my mind wanders. Spurting out a million ideas and thoughts at the same time.

Even the songs that get stuck in my head are usually completely random.

Today for example, I had several songs stuck in my head for varying hours throughout my day.

I had a tune from a kid's show stuck in my head most of my morning. Then, randomly I had Boyz II Men's "All My Life" stuck in my head, which is completely out of a rhino's butt since I haven't heard that song since a middle school dance. Then I had the chorus of Tenacious D's "Tribute" on play in my mind, only to be followed by Queen's "Don't Try Suicide."

This all happened during my Signal work shift.

I also talk to myself, just like any normal person does, and I want to do SO much right now. Most of my ideas conflict though... and it's hard.

Guess it's a trait of a Gemini.

Someone mentioned the other day that having a passion in life is what makes life worth living. That it gives you a purpose of some sort.

But what if you don't have a passion?

Or maybe you feel as if you have several?

What is the definition of "a passion" anyway? Here is what dictionary.com had to say.

pas⋅sion

–noun

1.	any powerful or compelling emotion or feeling, as love or hate.

2.	strong amorous feeling or desire; love; ardor.

3.	strong sexual desire; lust.

4.	an instance or experience of strong love or sexual desire.

5.	a person toward whom one feels strong love or sexual desire.

6.	a strong or extravagant fondness, enthusiasm, or desire for anything: a passion for music.

7.	the object of such a fondness or desire: Accuracy became a passion with him.

8.	an outburst of strong emotion or feeling: He suddenly broke into a passion of bitter words.

9.	violent anger.

10.	the state of being acted upon or affected by something external, esp. something alien to one's nature or one's customary behavior

Funny how some definitions seem to contradict themselves.

I feel like I have a passion for a lot of things... and that's the problem. If you have a passion for something, wouldn't you consistently be active in that passion? Shouldn't this passion compel you to dive completely into it and know absolutely everything about it? As if you were training for the Olympics? Or becoming an expert?

If that's the case, I have no passion. And I haven't decided if that's depressing or not yet.

It's depressing in the fact that I feel like I am no expert in any one thing. And that I happen to be drawn to certain things for frivolous reasons mainly because they selfishly satisfy me in one way or another.

On the other hand though, it's not depressing since I am essentially a "jack of all trades" who knows a little bit about a lot of issues. That, and the fact that it keeps my life interesting since I fill it with so much variety.

I don't know.

Things I feel like I have a potential absolute passion for:
1. Music: it's in my blood. Although I suck at lyric writing, everything else comes pretty naturally to me. Music is, essentially, life. But apparently that's a cliche nowadays.

2. Mother nature: I'm definitely a tree hugger, love the outdoors, and am constantly finding ways to be kinder to the earth. Currently I am looking into joining some sort of group that plants trees and cleans up trails for hikers/campers.

3. People/helping others: I don't know much about politics, economics, math (fuck math), taxes, how the world works, etc... but I feel like I have a really good grasp on humanity and interpersonal relationships. I read people fairly well, but more importantly, I understand how most people think. Being an RA definitely help me realize this, which has extended itself to my friends, family, co-workers, and strangers. I also have a deep desire to help people struggling with whatever, and I constantly feel like I have to be the bearer of light to them. Although I might not always "succeed" in bringing this light... I always feel like my involvement has helped in some way... even if it is fairly insignificant.

4. Traveling: Who wouldn't be passionate about this? The problem with this is that it's not something that you can technically do everyday. Not unless it's weaved into your career somehow.

Maybe my passion is myself. I have a passion to follow my heart and my selfish desires. To constantly please myself. Would that count?

I'm out of Johnny Walker. Time for bed.

Beauty in this ugly world

There is this amazing website called http://pixdaus.com/

I use it as an escape. Whenever I feel overwhelmed with how fast time flies by, angry at something largely insignificant, stressed out from frivolous day-to-day situations... I visit this site and it calms me down.

I typically put in my head phones and play Enigma. It helps to further pacify me.

These photos also remind me that this world isn't as ugly as it seems to be portrayed as of late.

Check these out and tell me they are not beyond beautiful. If you do, I will slap you in the balls.

I save my favorite ones and set them as my background to my computer screens at work.

I'm not gonna lie, they change every few days.

Family dinners are the best

I went home on my dinner break from work to eat with my entire family.

All of our schedules are different so we rarely sit together at a meal anymore. I came home excited to eat a hearty, delicious, home-cooked meal and to spend time with my family, particularly my dad and my older brother.

Tata is transitioning to be a full time truck driver, so I only see him a few times a week if we're both home at the moment.

And Mickey works in the morning and I work in the evening so we rarely see one another either.

I walk through the door and Mickey and Tata are putting the food on the table. Perfect timing. We sit and eat (halibut, shrimp, steamed veggies, and potatoes...yum!) and we're having a fun conversation, laughing and making fun of one another and other people.

And then I open my mouth and say something about hippies, and how I want to be one, and while Mickey and Matthew are just laughing at me calling me the furthest thing away from hippies since I shower, avoid smoking pot, wear shoes and don't drive a VW bus, my dad gets all political blaming what is happening now on the hippie movement.

Exqueeze me? A baking powder?

The entire mood is killed, and the convo turns political.

I don't mind talking politics, as long as it's with open minded, non-judemental, and logical people.

It just so happens my parents, specifically my mother, are none of those things.

I drift off and stop paying attention (because there's no winning with them) and start cleaning up the dishes. Matt quickly joins me and we escape the convo.

I just think its funny. Being all together... all five of us.... doesn't happen often, and instead of enjoying the company, it turns into a heated debate.

God I sure do love living at home!

Cowboys

Here's another piece I thoroughly enjoyed writing.

The cowboy life through song.
http://www.the-signal.com/news/article/8967/

Enjoy my friends!

Pet peeve #1008: Bumpy Roads

I don't have road rage at other drivers, pedestrians, or annoying children staring at me out of their windows. I don't get mad when I get cut off, or when someone drives extremely slow, or even when someone is yapping away on his/her phone.

I do have road rage over the quality of roads I'm driving on though. Especially in the Santa Clarita Valley.

It seems like every street is covered in pot holes, protruding sewers, or just poor construction clean up.

I mean, honestly? Is it really that expensive to add enough concrete to match the rest of the street you just completely fucked up?

The Old Road is one of the worst roads. Half the time I'm swerving to avoid the gnarly holes in the ground.

And it seems like Santa Clarita can't get enough road construction on their plate. It's like crack to them. They rip up the streets night after night. As soon as they're done doing a shitty job laying down the cement to cover the hole, they move to another location and start over again.

Valencia Blvd is recently getting worked on ... and it's turning into the new Old Road.

I just don't understand. If "we the people" are paying taxes for these public works, why not do a good job the first time so the city won't have to return to these same locations years later (after receiving enough complaints by me) and finally put a fresh slate of cement to smooth out the cracks.

In the end, the only reason this became a pet peeve in the first place is because I have a jumpy CD player and my music skips after every imperfection in the road.

And I can't stand that.

Recent stories

Here are some recent stories I'm proud of.


This one is about a local jazz vocalist. Amazing individual. I wish I could have written more.
http://www.the-signal.com/news/article/8663/

This one is about a woman who went to Africa to volunteer for three months. She's inspired me to go to Africa!
http://www.the-signal.com/news/article/8321/

Food for thought

"Most of the time, your greatest pleasures come from poeple, not things. so in order to be happy, all you have to do is hang out with friends who enjoy life as much as you do."